The Catherinette Chronicles

A very fine morning to you on this, the first morning of 2009.  Here’s what I want to know:
Who went out there last night and made some bad decisions that ended up turning into the cocktail flu this morning?
Nothing like waking up in the New Year with a blinding headache that makes you wish someone [...]

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I don’t hide the fact that my mom can be “special” sometimes.  I mean lick the window, bang your head against the wall, drool while you talk special.  There’s the time that she told me that John Lennon was going to be on TV every night, and that other time that she thought there was [...]

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Last night I went over to my sister’s house to celebrate Damien’s 4th birthday.  It’s hard to believe he’s lived to this age.  I was sure, when he was little, that he was going to end up under the wheels of the car or drowned in the bathtub by a family member.  We don’t call [...]

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Should I tell you about the time that I got so hammered in London that I ran around the city, by myself, without a coat or a purse until 7:00 am?  And how when I sobered up I had no recollection of where all my stuff was?  And how there was an explosion of orange [...]

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As promised, here’s a little excerpt from my travel journal…

Next time we go on vacation, mom’s getting a checklist which she must use prior to leaving the house. While her initial idea was to leave at 4pm (4.5 hours before we really needed to get to the airport-the flight left at 9:15), we weren’t on [...]

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In the immortal words of John Denver, I’m leaving on a jet plane, don’t know when I’ll be back again.  Okay, so I actually do know when I’ll be back again, but it would jack up the song if I wrote that I was leaving on a jet plane and I know when I’ll be [...]

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Explain something to me: why do parents always feel compelled to bore single people with stories about their kids?  Don’t they see that glazed look that comes over me, or the eye rolling?  Don’t they hear that sigh of desperation the second they hear, “I have the funniest story to tell you about little Johnny/Joanna?”  [...]

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In 16 days I’m off to England for a week!  This will be my 6th trip over to England.  The first time I went, I absolutely fell in love with London.  If I could only choose one vacation spot for the rest of my life, I wouldn’t hesitate to choose that glorious city.  My mom [...]

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My dog, Cujo, is currently outside trying to destroy the back porch.  He’s not trying to eat it, nor is he ripping it to shreds.  Rather, he’s attempting to burrow underneath it to find some small animal that clearly wronged him in some way.  Cujo enjoys going on rampages in the backyard. 
Earlier in the year, [...]

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Good help can be so hard to find nowadays. Really. I’ll give you the example of my good friend, Disney. He and his wife decided to hire someone to help clean the house. Come to find out that in addition to cleaning their home, she’s also calling her family…in Mexico.
Then there’s my situation with lawn [...]

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