The Catherinette Chronicles

Let me start off by thanking each and everyone one of you that has HOUNDED me to finish the story.  Oh, it’s a good one.  Might I suggest that you grab yourself a drink and/or a snack and get comfortable.  Ready?  Here we go…
It’s been over a year since we saw each other.  As a [...]

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One of the benefits of working in the same building for the last 8 years, and having had various office trysts, is walking past places were I enjoyed an illicit kiss or two. Years ago on a Sunday, I “made out” (see Bartles & Jaymes) with my boyfriend at the time in my cubicle. We [...]

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I received an email from 3D this afternoon. For the last few weeks he’s been grasping at straws trying to get me to pay attention to him.  I have told him, repeatedly that it wasn’t going to happen. Finally, I just stopped replying to his calls, text messages, and emails.
And then this showed up in [...]

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What a crap day.  I dragged myself out of bed feeling like ass cheeks, crammed myself into a pair of pants that are getting too tight, which leads me to believe that I’m getting FAT.  So there I am feeling all fat and crappy, trying not to die at my desk, when I find out [...]

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When did this happen to me?  When did I become this person that was so interested in politics that I sat down and watched an entire debate?  I mean, sure, I majored in Politics in college.  But I always knew I would never go into it because it was dirty.  I’ve manged to avoid every [...]

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Good help can be so hard to find nowadays. Really. I’ll give you the example of my good friend, Disney. He and his wife decided to hire someone to help clean the house. Come to find out that in addition to cleaning their home, she’s also calling her family…in Mexico.
Then there’s my situation with lawn [...]

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Those were the first words out of his mouth after I had picked up the phone. Lit’l Smokey was on his way out, and he was calling me. “Um…okay. But you can’t have mine,” I told him. What, exactly, is serious vagina? Does it not laugh when you tell it funny jokes? Does it only [...]

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Ah, the sweet sweet joys of womanhood. There are far too many to count: we have jubblies, we can grow other human beings inside our own bodies, we can bring home the bacon and fry it up in a pan, we can even be nominees for the Vice President of the United States. Then there’s [...]

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There are some hidden perks to living the single life.  I was in my nightgown (a frumpy ass granny nightie) by 5:15.  I watched 3 episodes of Mad Men while I inhaled a healthy dinner.  Mmm…nothing like grilled peaches and goat cheese served over spring greens.  It’s amazing what you can do with 5 minutes [...]

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No, really. I casually logged into facebook 2 seconds ago only to see a status update from Notebook:
Notebook handed his lady a diamond ring this morning.
Oh, and based on the comments on his status, looks like he’ll be in town in 2 weeks to celebrate with friends and family. I’ll totally be the [...]

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