I just spent the last 90 minutes getting drilled in the mouth, and being surrounded by Pro Lube, and dental dams. And I don’t mean in the same way that Foxy Luv does-in stall #1 of the men’s room at the local bus station. Rather, it was take 2 of my wonderful root canal. You know the stupid ass emergency root canal that I had done the day I left for my trip. The one that is going to cost me $1000 and will cause me to sell all my eggs to raise the money.
God I hate my dentist. Dr. Giggles is one of those men that makes the lamest ass jokes and thinks they’re hilarious. Meanwhile everyone else just stares blankly at him and then sighs. Here’s an example of something he nearly wet himself laughing over:
Dr. Giggles: You know what I found to be really funny?
Hygienist: What’s that doctor?
Dr. Giggles: When I was in Russia in the middle of winter, and I saw all these ice cream stands.
Hygienist: [Blank stare over her mask]
Dr. Giggles: People were actually wandering around eating ice cream in the freezing cold! [proceeds to laugh so hard that he had to turn off the drill so he didn't hurt me]
Not funny. Right?
Here’s what would have been funny. If I had been able to shout “that’s what she said” after he said the following things:
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There it goes, it slipped in so easily.
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Plenty of wiggle room in there.
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Can you clean her up? I’m making a mess here.
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Man, that is so tight I can barely get anything in there.
7 responses so far ↓
1 Rhea // Dec 4, 2008 at 4:22 pm
I hope Dr. Giggles never reads your blog. He could seek revenge with all that scary equipment and the bad jokes.
2 Dog // Dec 4, 2008 at 4:25 pm
Get a digital recorder and record “That’s what she said” on it.
Keep it under the drape so you can repeatedly hit play at full volume and act like you have no clue where the noise is coming from.
3 David // Dec 4, 2008 at 5:40 pm
Dog - Brilliant!!!!
4 Jormengrund // Dec 5, 2008 at 9:26 am
To be fair, you could have tried, but it would’ve only come out as a..
“Tghwghtshgesaighnd”
It just really doesn’t have the same effect, you know?
5 Catherinette // Dec 5, 2008 at 9:37 am
Rhea: Give me some credit here. It’s not like I would say, “Hey! Guess what? I’m a blogger and just wrote a post about you.” I don’t tell a lot a people. It’s like my dirty little secret. That and the fact that I think Tommy Lee is dirty hot.
Dog: LOVE IT!! I’m toatally going to do that!
David: We should give him the noble prize or something.
Jormengrund: I couldn’t have even have done that because they had one of those awful dental dams in my mouth. Instead it would have just caused me to choke and drool all over myself (that’s what she said).
6 Jormengrund // Dec 5, 2008 at 4:29 pm
Let me get this right then..
You would try to say something, only to choke and drool all over yourself?
I thought you liked that kind of stuff..
Maybe Dr. Giggles is your secret soulmate?
7 Catherinette // Dec 8, 2008 at 8:29 pm
Of course I love that kind of stuff, but only when I’m amongst friends, not trapped in the clutches of someone like Dr. Giggles. -CS
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