David Caruso is quite possibly the biggest douche bag in the world, and I know douche bags. I never understood all of the hype surrounding him. I remember when NYPD Blue premiered a hundred years ago. I was barely out of womb (or in my early teens), and clearly recall that his ugly mug graced the covers of tons of magazine. Even at that tender young age, I was mystified by his popularity. He’s a red headed freak, he can’t act to save his life, and he’s not attractive. How does a guy like him make it in Hollywood? One of life’s little mysteries.
He decided to leave NYPD Blue to pursue a film career. Bad move on his part. That decision was akin to eating fast food everyday because you plan on losing weight. His film career didn’t go as planned, which was a blessing to those of us that didn’t care for him in the first place.
Fast forward several years and suddenly he’s on CSI Miami. What makes matters even worse is that the show took off and he’s popular again. WHY?? Someone explain this to me!! How can you take this show have fans? I just don’t get it.
But don’t take my word for it. Go ahead and take a gander and then tell me what you think:
21 responses so far ↓
1 Jormengrund // Nov 28, 2008 at 9:17 am
The reason is simple:
He plays the perfect cop!
I mean, how many cops do you know that are really personable and likeable?
Not to say there aren’t some out there, but I’d have to say that 90% are going to fall into his category. That’s why NYPD Blue and CSI:Miami are doing so well.
If you put him into any other role, he sucks, and people know it.
Facts are facts!
2 mella // Nov 28, 2008 at 9:58 am
I freakin’ hate this guy and his sunglasses of ‘Justice’. I think it should be a drinking game, where everytime he cocks his head and says something retarded, you take a shot. You’d be loaded by the first commercial!
I swear, he went to the William Shatner School of Dramatic Pauses!
3 the human // Nov 28, 2008 at 11:41 am
I quit watching that show years ago because of his character. Wouldn’t it be nice if he went undercover on some operation and Michael Chiklis, who wasn’t informed, dealt out a little of his particular brand of ‘justice’. Either that or maybe one day a croc would just swallow him. Whole.
4 Foxy // Nov 28, 2008 at 11:58 am
He’s the worst - he gives ginger kids everywhere a bad name.
5 Hannah // Nov 28, 2008 at 2:48 pm
oh wow. he’s really bad. I’m embarrassed for him…since clearly he’s oblivious to the awfulness that is him
6 SouthernChickie // Nov 28, 2008 at 3:03 pm
THANK YOU THANK YOU. I’d rather have a oozing herpes sore than have to watch his over-acting ass.
I can fake an orgasm better than this guy can act!!
But I do have to say, he does manage to put on his sunglasses without poking an eye out, that’s about his only skill though.
7 Jenna // Nov 28, 2008 at 6:08 pm
I concur! The show itself isn’t that bad, without him. The characters are decent and Miami looks like tons of fun. But lord almighty is he freaking useless. There was a bit where we thought he was dead and I thought that would have been the best storyline they ever thought up. Alas, it was a hoax and he’s back putting on his sunglasses for dramatic effect. Ugh.
8 Justine // Nov 28, 2008 at 8:57 pm
Dude, haven’t you seen the OTHER guys on the show? Adam Rodriguez is hot like fire. I watch the show for him.
9 John Fossey // Nov 28, 2008 at 10:23 pm
I agree with you. He does nothing for me. God help me. If I see him put those damn shades on one more time with the sound byte to match , I may just never visit Miami. Have fun in merry old England
10 diesel // Nov 29, 2008 at 10:56 pm
That is one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen. If I hadn’t seen the show, I would have thought it was a joke. It’s like he’s parodizing himself.
Not only is he impossible to watch; the show is crappily written as well. I stopped trying to watch after one episode with a gigantic plot hole.
11 pistols at dawn // Nov 30, 2008 at 9:12 pm
I like it when he’s in a show, because it lets me know I never, ever have to watch it.
12 Cat // Dec 1, 2008 at 10:43 am
I hopped that when he quit NYPD Blue that would be the last we ever heard of him, but no he’s back. Ugh.
13 Catherinette // Dec 1, 2008 at 6:20 pm
Jormengrund: You can’t honestly believe that all cops are egotistical douche bags that put on their sunglasses on like tools. That’s not possible.
Mella: If they made a drinking game like that, people would die from alcohol poisoning.
The Human: I’d like to see him do a season on Oz from HBO. Maybe they could bring it back and document what life would be like for him on the “inside”.
Foxy: He makes me want to weep for the gingers.
Hannah: He really is the f’ing worst.
Southern Chickie: He does also seem to be able to deliver his lines without drooling all over himself. There’s another thing he seems to do well.
Jenna: I can’t stand the chick that plays the Medical Examiner on the show. If one of them isn’t ruining the scene, it’s the other one. But you’re right about Miami looking pretty sweet.
Justine: He is hot, but not even he can redeem the show from Caruso’s ass cheeks acting.
John Fossey: You know the best part about England? I didn’t have to hear anything about David Caruso the whole time!!
Diesel: You’ve just discovered every episode ever written.
Pistols at Dawn: There you go, always looking at the bright side.
Cat: He’s like genital warts. You just never know when he’ll be back.
14 Expat // Dec 2, 2008 at 8:08 am
Ugh that guy’s voice makes my skin crawl.
15 nikkicrumpet // Dec 2, 2008 at 9:15 am
HAH…I love it when Joel on “The Soup” on E does his imitation of Caruso…it cracks me up! Sadly his mocking of Caruso is a sample of better acting !! I’m glad you came over to my blog…I’m having the best time snooping here at your place!
16 Catherinette // Dec 2, 2008 at 1:35 pm
Expat: Probably because his voice sucks ass.
nikkicrumpet: Yay for snooping and yay for Joel from The Soup!
17 Grant Miller, Esq. // Dec 2, 2008 at 3:34 pm
He is such a bad actor it hurts. It really causes pain.
18 Catherinette // Dec 3, 2008 at 7:46 am
Grant Miller: It causes the kind of pain for which there is no pain killer. Not even vicadin can help.
19 Elisabeth // Dec 3, 2008 at 7:56 am
I concur. Seriously!
But I think Jormengrund is right, he’s custom made or the egotistical cop role.
20 Catherinette // Dec 4, 2008 at 7:55 am
Do you think he’s like that in real life? I really would be interested in meeting him just to see.
21 Vixen // Dec 9, 2008 at 4:32 pm
Do you think he’s like that in real life? I really would be interested in meeting him just to see.
People who worked with him on the set tell real horror stories about this diet-coke swilling diva….
I am sure he is that way off camera too. Three ex-wives will agree.
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