There are sex shops in every city, of course, but while they’re steadily improving as sex becomes more mainstream*, most of them still earn their seedy, grotty, porn-ish reputation.

(*”sex becomes more mainstream”: aren’t I just the mistress of irony?)

Of those which rise above seediness, the majority have gone from tacky-sex to tacky-commercial. Big box sex stores. Brighter lights, bigger buildings, but every bit as tawdry, with the added dimension of “soul-less”.

And then there are those lovely outfits, very often run by women, that rise up to be what a sex store should be. Manned (womanned?) by sensible staff (often trained in human sexuality), they respond intelligently to customer’s questions, spoken and unspoken.

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My favourite store is this one. But why do I like it so well? It’s not the bright lights and wide aisles. It’s not the presence of real, live books (!!!) and the comfy chairs for reading, nor the absence of tacky gag gifts. (”Gag” as in joke. If you’re into the other kind, you can find them in the clean, bright rear right corner.) It’s not even the sensible, intelligent staff, nor the great workshops the store hosts after hours.

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It took me a few visits to understand why I liked it appealed, why it felt so much more female-friendly than the other, equally nicely-laid out and staffed store in town.

It is the absence of packaging.

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Any woman who’s bought herself a toy knows what I mean. Packaging covered in pictures of women who are clearly in the “adult entertainment industry”. Porn star chic. Plaything of the masses. Every man’s wet dream.

Except, you know? Even though I do have a man in my life, I don’t tend to buy a vibrator thinking of his pleasure. I buy it thinking of my own. Oh, it’ll be shared pleasure often enough, but I’M buying the damned thing for ME. I’d bet most of them are purchased by women. So why are they marketed at men?

What do you think: is the packaging off-putting? If so, what would you rather see?